An admission
I made a big decision today. I came out as an Archers listener. Note that I said âlistener”, not âfan”. This is very important. I donât, for instance, feel the need to write to the BBC and complain that cows take about 300 days to be cured of mastitis, and NOT two weeks as the so-called writers believe1. Nor do I believe that Ambridge is a real place. I know this because:
- Everyone knows each other, and, more importantly, speaks to one another.
- Ambridge has a village shop, and people buy things in it every day.
- No one goes to a big supermarket.
- Everyone who lives in the village works in it. It is not full of people who visit at the weekends and find it âterribly convenient for the City - just a quick hop down the motorway in the Beemer on a Friday night”.
Despite all that, itâs blumminâ exciting at the moment. Mr. Smarmy-Love-Rat-Git-Face-Bastard (aka Brian Aldridge) has finally been found out, and now has to choose between sultry Irish temptress Siobhan, and long-suffering wife and cake-baker extraordinaire, Jennifer. Itâll all end in tears, you mark my words.
1When surfing briefly to check the correct recovery rate (I know - Iâm a sad sad person, but I aim for accuracy), I discovered that there is a journal called Udder Topics. I must subscribe immediately.
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I find myself ringing my mother in the evenings so we can discuss how it serves Brian right, although I have yet to admit this to my close friends
Ambridge is not that unrealistic though. In my parents village, most everyone knows eachother and we don't really have people with weekend homes (not picturesque enough), but it's true that few people work in the village and most people shop at the supermarket down the way most of the time. It's also got more than 20 people in it, otherwise it wouldn't be able to support a shop and a pub!----- Yeah, I guess there are still some traditional villages left, but unfortunately they seem to be a dying breed.
Did you hear the episode this evening? I won't wreck it for any weekend omnibus listeners, but... You tell him sister! Go Debbie, go Debbie, go Debbie...
This will be such an unintelligible conversation for anyone who doesn't follow The Archers.
by bsag @ 18/12/2002 8:12 pm • Permalink •
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The difference between an Archers listener and an Archers fan is like the difference between somebody who tells his Tivo to record anything Star Trek and the person who disowns his mother for refusing to say grace in klingon.
Thank god for the internet 'cause I'm heading off to Iceland for a family christmas over the next couple of weeks.
by Baldur Bjarnason @ 18/12/2002 11:12 pm • Permalink •
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Hehehehe. Do Klingons say grace? Or just hit one another with pain sticks before eating?
by bsag @ 19/12/2002 7:12 pm • Permalink •
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