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31 Oct 2003
p. Like many women, I have occasional bouts of gloomy dissatisfaction with the shape of my body. Some of this is due to a slight insecurity, and some to utter frustration with the manufacturers of women's clothing, who seem to think that women are basically cylindrical like men. Mr. Bsag--who is always telling me that proper women are supposed to be my shape--found the perfect poem for me; it's called ["A Homage to My Hips(The poem is about half way down the page)":http://www.geocities.com/womenpoets/clifton.html], and is by Lucille Clifton. I can't imagine a nicer gift--the poem is a wonderful celebration of the body. I found "a page":http://www.poets.org/poems/poems.cfm?prmID=1459 on which you're supposed to be able to listen to Lucille reading her poem, but I didn't have any luck with the RealOne audio file. That's a shame, as I'd love to hear her reading it.
p. I'm going to copy it out and pin it up beside the mirror to remind myself to be proud of my shape.
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Bravo,
I'm glad that you found something to ease your concerns. Society as a whole has really done a number on woman about their bodies. At times, this weighs a little more heavily on ethnic women, whose body types have been stereotyped in a way that is rarely flattering. There aren't many African American woman shaped like Naomi.
My now 15 year old daughter has been concerned about her thicker thighs, her large breasts and shapely bottom since she was 12. I've had to repeatedly convince her not to try dieting. I mean geez, she's a size 7! She's in a catholic school that has a wonderful education program but not racially diversified. The girls that she socializes with are rail thin, and even so, some are dieting and have been since they were 12. I'm constantly explaining to her that no matter how much weight she loses, she's NEVER going to be shaped like them. I think it's a said statement about what we've done to the self image of little girls, let alone women.
by Lauren Michele @ 05/11/2003 12:11 am • Permalink •
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Thank you for the poetry link. I am still hung up on white male Englishmen, mainly. Diversification is extremely welcome. Taa.
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Lauren: I agree totally. I'm Caucasian, but managed to pick female friends who were universally tall, willowy and elegant. No one will ever be able to accuse me of being any of those 
. I spent a few years desperately trying to be like them, before I realized that I never would be, however much I dieted and tried to buy nice clothes. I found out that I quite liked myself the way I was, though I still have the odd relapse. I hope that your daughter also comes to realize that she is beautiful -- puberty can be such a hellish time. I certainly sounds like you are telling her all the right things. At some point she'll realize that you are right!
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My wife will love this poem. I often tell her the same. Thank you for the link.----- Nathan: you're welcome. The poem came from a fantastic anthology Mr. Bsag borrowed from the library, called 'Staying Alive: Real Poems for Unreal Times' edited by Neil Astley. There are some wonderful uplifting, bleak, funny, sad and thought-provoking poems in it from all sorts of different poets.
by bsag @ 01/11/2003 7:11 pm • Permalink •